Friday, October 21

Vyteni, what are you doing up at 4:39am?!

Well, I'll tell you! I have inventory this morning from 5am-2pm. I know, I know. You're all thinking "Wow, that's so cool! I wish I could wake up at crazy time! Want to switch jobs?" No, I don't. I love my job. What other job can you wake up super early and be at work for no real reason? Only at CompUSA. Thank you, CompUSA. I dunno how you did it, but you keep making me glad I came back to work there.

Thursday, October 13

If i could be anything in the world i would be?

So many the Minnesota went out and had some sort of wild sex party on a cruise in lake Minnetonka, and now they are being labeled as bad role models. What's the deal with that. seems to me like that would be a good role model. Become very successful at something, and you can go out and have wild sex parties. All of those players went to college, and are elite members of their proffesion. I wonder if a bunch of CEOs went and had a wild sex party if they would be considered bad role models. It seems to me like something to aspire to. In fact I've just made that one of my life goals, to have a wild sex party on a cruise ship.

Wednesday, October 12

Wooooooo 50

So, some more random memories from neringa that were not on the big board.

Me and vytenis had a pamoka as i think i mentioned before where the kids would write a story 1 word at a time. So were writing with probably 8tas namelis, and the story was progessing normally, and the current sentence was about a big colorful, and the next girl says siknele, with the birdie over the s. Vytenis just looks at her and says "i hate you", and she innocently says "what, doesn't it mean skirt?" When it became clear she had intended to say suknele

The stories themselves were mostly hilarious, if we still had them i would post them all up here, but i gave them to gintare to put in the laikrastelis, and then she didn't put them in, and she never gave me back the stories, so now they are gone forever. When i did it with my namelis, pirmas, they wrote a story about being lost in a giant piece of cheese. It was quite hilarious, and ended on the simple but brilliant line, as ne durnas, as noriu surio. Which i then forced them to use as a sukis, and also put into our star wars play.

Also as far as i know there has been no mention of our starwars play yet, which hilarious. I think my favorite line was when obi-wan met luke, and luke starts singing that song, labas as esu jouzas, as if that was his life story, at which point obi-wan slaps him in the face, and says nobody cares about your stupid miktuko fabrikas. I always hated that song, so that was an especially satisfying line for me. ALthough i also really liked that darth vader and obi-wan passed each other in the airport, and didn't recognize each other. I don't remember exactly how the sequence, went but one of them was like "wait, do i know you" "know i think i'd remember you" "are you sure, you seem very familiar" "no i never forget a face" and so on several times before they realize who they are

Also how is that the smoked bacon a brought never warranted any comments on the big board. Unlike those foolish children who bring candy to camp, i brought six and a half pounds of smoked bacon from the butcher. It was totally the best idea i've ever had. We would go into the viturve at 1 in the morning and just eat big slices of bacon. Plus we made bacon nachos which were totally awesome, even thouigh the tortilla chips were stale, the cheese was pre-sliced american cheese, the we didn't have any whatchamacall it, that spicy tomato sauce. the lesson is bacon makes anything taste delicious.

Also for konkursu diena the whole day was where's waldo themed, people were searching for waldo all day, and there were varios hints about him being at neringa, and at the end of the night, they found him. SO then the next day at the lauzas, we didn't hvae a play or anything else funny to do, so i just got up in front of everybody and started talking very seriously about how i had very important news, and everyone should listen very closely, waldo was some place at neringa, before vytenis and tomas came up, stopped me, and informed me that they had already found waldo last night. the bit went on for a couple minutes with the end being that we started singing some song. It was simple and easy, but still funny.

Tuesday, October 11

drunken musings

So tonight i went out with liepa, and agne, who went to school with us in 7th grade in lietuva and we randomly met on a micro bus a couple of weeks ago. It's a small world afterall.

Anyway liepa was upset because the guy she was with was not hitting on her enough and just trying to be friends with everyone, which was not what she wanted, meanwhile agne was upset because the guy she was with was hitting on her too much when all she wanted was to be friends with him. I tried to convince them that they need to be clearer about their intentions, and more importantly that whatever complaints they may have aboout meant, at least men are completely obvious. There is never any doubt about their intentions, which you certainly cannot say for women. anyway's they weren't buying it, but it's totally true.

Agne also didn't want to believe that whenever guys are at a club/bar and they are talking or dancing or hanging out with a girl that they are not doing to it just to be friends with said girl. She wanted to believe that is is completely normal for guys to just go to a bar and find girls to be friends with, while i tried to explain to her that in fact any time a guy spends time with a girl in a club it is in the hope of spending the night with her.

ALso is there anything more annoying than the fact that the buses stop running at 11 and don't start again until like 5:30. if they would start again at 4 that would be one thing, because then you could legitimately stay out all night and take a bus home in the morning, but as it is, if you want to take a bus home in the morning you have to stay out later than you want to . It's totally retarted to make people take a taxi home every night they want to go out partying.

also am i the only one who thinks vytenis looks like a girl. Seriously, i think he might have been born a girl, but then his parents wanted a boy, so they had him surgically changed into a boy. That would also explain his inordinately small penis.

what did you say?

So here is my comment on the post with all the quotes from neringa, but it's long enough that i figured i should put it up as it's own quote instead of as a comment.

Okay so first off, that is totally hilarious, but second off, i feel like some of the best quotes warrant an explanation to make them fully funny

As reikia pinigus was a quote from one of the stovyklautojiai during his play 2 years ago, and when we laughed at him he was like what is it supposed to be as reikia pinigu? so then we also used that in our play to be funny.

How could 11tas win the slouta when they are so very dirty is my favorite quote i think. Cause they won the slouta for being the cleanest namelis the same day they wrote a story for a pamoka with me and vytenis, and said story was fully of sexual deviancy involving people ranging from me and vytenis to aldona.

I just reached into vytenio crotch to grab some peanuts i believe was also me, cause there was a huge bag of peanuts that everyone was eating. anyway it was hilarious.

close the door i'm trying to sleep was also hilarious. i don't remember exactly what happened, either vytenis or gintas were sleeping my bed, and when i went in to take a nap, they asked me to leave and close the door cause they were trying to sleep. at which point i got into my bed with said person, and homoeroticism resulted.

nosegame was also hilarious, because vytenis had written it going downwards with big spaces between the letters and i read it as a lithuanian word, and was like nosegame, what the hell is that.

also my dream was totally awesome and crazy but i don't remember most of it now. The most important parts are that i woke up in some strange place, and i thought i must be in somebody elses house, and then i looked down at my hand and my thumb was missing, and i thought i must be dreaming, but then i looked in the fridge and it was full of smoked bacon, and i realized that it must be real because otherwise my fridge wouldn't be full of smoked bacon. then when i looked at my hand my thumb was back, and i realized i wasn't dreaming i had just been really tired, but then i switched to a different version of myself that was out partying, and eventually the 2 version intersected, like in back to the future, and i woke up, cause the universe in the form of my dream collapsed on itself.

when someone told simas there was a bat in the dirbtuve, he was at that same moment holding a baseball bat from the dirbtuve, and responds, i know, it's in my hands, and they are like no, there's a bad in the dirbtuve, to which simas again responds i know, i'm holding it. soon they managed to convinvce simas that there was also a living bat in the dirbtuve in addition tot he one he was holding in his hands

The rest are either self explanatory, not as funny, or i'm not familiar with.

Sunday, October 9

Walk-a-thon

I'll make this short because I just posted a super long post, and I'm sure Gintas will add on to this. The walkathon was awesome. Minus the heavy downpour all weekend and minus all my wet clothes. Anyway, it was great. Partied hard as usual, raised some money, had a great time. If you didn't come this year, come next year, spread the word, AND COME TO WINTER NERINGA.


PS- If you buy a handle of Jager, you now get a pump for it. And, as most of us know from this weekend, IT'S AMAZING. We strongly advise you to get one as soon as humanly possible.

Neringa 2k5

Ok, so we're a little late on posting about how awesome Neringa was this year. Well, the staff at Kaip Suprast has been busy lately, so sucks for you. That being said, Neringa was awesome. You're probably wondering "How awesome was it, Vyteni?" The following is a quick synopsis of the events that happened in 5 weeks. WARNING: The following content contains offensive language. drug references and cartoon nudity. May not be suitable for children under 16. (Everything is spelled the way it was on our note board.)

PASTABOS, PRANEŠIMAI ir T.T.
-Aš reikia pinigus!
-I'M DAINA!
-Titties titties bounce!
-Splat
-Password = Tacos
-EINU VALGYTI 12:00
-Vytenis/Gintas grįžo 12:30
-Gintas/Vytenis atsisedo 3:50
-Aš ----> 8:W0 (Editors note: Who wrote this and wtf is it!?)
-POSEDIS 9:25
-Lime w/ coke confused w/ line of coke
-8:50 - Vytenis, Gaja, Nyka, Kristina, Grazina still asleep - missing out on snausages and omlettes - what a shame!
-Ohh biker!... I'm an idiot
-Bus Krušal
-9:33 seks rankdarbiai
-There's a lifeguard b/c there's a hurricane in it you're going to drown 10:0P (Gintai, revision?)
-She just ate dirt
-Seks rankdarbiai
-L.J.S.
-Amazing
-LO BLO
-Titty squirrels!
-Boobs & a heartbeat, Aistis is there (Editors note: Hahaha!!!!)
-How could 11tas win the šluota when they are so dirty? (Editors note: Hahaha)
-What the fuck!? I'm gonna kill you motherfucker! (Editors note: Vytenio favorite quote courtesy of Lokys. See end of post)
-I just reached into Vytenio crotch to grab some peanuts
-But I don't wanna be Picard!
-Aistis + Joana = GROSS COUCH
-They're all whores
-Huh? -Q
-Move it to the other side of the car =)
-GODEAMOS
-There's a kid here named Steven?
-Palauk! Reikia salami užbeigt!
-ŠIKT IR ŠOKT -Alvydo pamoką
-Pridariai, pušikai- laid one egg, kaip sakai
-I want ice cream... no sprinkles... for every sprinkle I find I shall KILL YOU!!! -The Great One
-That kid looks like he's stuck in the 70's
-Close the door - I'm trying to sleep
-She has boobs????
-"I would never go down that road... EVER"
-It looks like a broken TV screen
-I'm black at heart
-What- I love black people?
-Is he suppose to rape him?
-Aš noriu tavo tešla paminkint
-Why is she eating his face?
-Alcohol and music...
-Jautienos Valgytojes
-Nosegame?
-If I was a girl, I'd definately be the biggest whore
-Atrodai kad tu esi gay
-Hey Frodo, why don't you ever wear sandals?
-Tu ne "girtas", tu "super girtas"
-Tu ne prisisėdi, blet, as tau pamyšiu į smegenys
-"Neringa is so much fun." Wait.. the girl?
-Is this dėž? It smells like period
-The rice is always the same
Yeah, but it is consistent
-Do it... you won't do it... do it... c'mon do it
-Simai you smell like clean
-Have a nice morning sucker!
-So- what kind of drugs do you want?
-Simas is wearing a pimp hat... He knows how to wear a pimp hat
-If this is poison, then your mom is a whore!
-The girl in 11tas with the itchy crotch --> Why do you think they itch (Pointing at Simas)
-Can you imagine Darius and Alvydas at my birthday party?
-Also, I'm having the best dream but I forgot... something crazy
-Birds can fly into a tree so lets cut down all the trees
-Lokys' dream
-Einu žurėti Norberto mėsa, gal jau dega
-Don't worry man... don't think so much
-I hope the orange juice and meat don't mix to form EVIL
-Hey... you could take her to the movies!
-Simai... there's a bat in here
-Sirvydas- "Gintai tu mano draugas"
Gintas- "O aš tavo. I mean, tu mano"
-Gintas- "Kur eini?"
Austė- "Aš turiu ištuštinti save vagina!"
-Why can't we eat the same meat?
-Lokys- "I just pulled out like five eyelids. Who wants to make a wish??"
Simas- "I'll make a wish- Trečia savaite. If it doesn't happen, your eyeglasses are worthless and I get to shave your whole face"
-It tastes like chemicals
-If this is what piss tastes like I want some!
-I'm hairy like a peach!
-It's good for the soul... it's like Campbell's soup
-What are you baking w/ your mouth? A penis?
-My heart hurts
-Liepa, drop some wisdom
-Čia tai gabalas!
-I think you guys are made of god
-Bring some popsicles and shit... please?
-Mano namelyje gyvena menininkai
-Seselė Seselė
*Last line unclear, Gintai, can you make it out?*

The thing about my favorite quote is that me and Lokys were sitting in the valgykla reading books about Lugan history for our Kaip Suprast klase. It was about how at the turn of the century the nobles in Lietuva were speaking more polish, while the farmers were speaking Lugan. So its basically me and him in the valgykla, real quiet, and I ask a question about the polish speaking thing and we start having a serious discussion about it, and he explains "...So when the nobles found out the Russians didn't want them to speak any Lugan they were like..." then he gets all Lokys like and yells "..What the fuck!? I'm gonna kill you motherfucker!"

Friday, October 7

Alcohol and night swimming. It's a winning combination!

I'm going out drinking. If something good happens i'll report upon my return.

If something really good happens, i'll report tomorrow after she's gone home.

If nothing good happens, i'll keeping drinking all day tomorrow until something good happens.

Sunday, October 2

Sure, Everything looks bad if you remember it.

So i'm posting, because the other night something super hilarious happened. I told liepa several times that the next morning i would write about on kaip suprast, however as often happens i forgot said thing, but it was totally hilarious, and i'm sure you would have all got a kick out of it, so you can just pretend like you read something really funny and go about your day, or you can read about a couple of other funny incidents from the night in question that are still lodged in my memory.

So liepa and i drank a little at home, and then some more on the bus, so when we got to the first bar, and met up with everyone, she was the only one not to order a beer. Well that was all well in good if she didn't want to start drinking again right away. So after half and or so, everyone has finished their beer and we decided to go to a bar where there was room to sit inside, because a couple of people were getting cold. We arrive at the bar, and once again everyone orders beer, it get's to liepa's turn, and this time she decides whe will in fact get something, she orders some soup.

Later that night we were hanging out with a bunch of lithuanians, and one of them asked whether i knew anything about some guy named hagel. But what i heard very clearly was jager. And so i looked back and was like "Jager?" and he nodded his head, also having not heard me properly, and so i said again "jagermeister?" and then he said "no no jager, jager" or at least that's what i heard. needless to say the situation continued in confusion for at least 30 seconds, before i finally realized what was going on, and we all had a long delicious laugh.

also i just remembered another hilariouscity which occured when liepa and i threw a party at our place a couple weeks ago. We were sitting around the coffee table, when someone noticed what appeared to be a news paper article sitting on table. He picked it up and started reading it, find the headline "Alcoholic father dissapointed in pothead son to be very funny." They found a couple more such articles and people started reading them thinking that they were real news, not realizing they actually articles from the onion that aras had printed out and left there. One was actually about the other supreme court justices devouring sandra day o'connor after she retired, in a ritual that dated back to the first supreme court.

Saturday, October 1

Long awaited update v1.0

Ok, so Lokys keeps bitching at me to update, because Gintas is too busy playing ping-pong all day in hopes that he will beat me at the Walk-a-thon, so here. The Walk-a-thon is next weekend (Oct. 7-9), and I'm pretty sure outta the 5-6 people who read this blog, 3 will be attending (you suck Loky, Arai, and the occasional Dariau). That being said, it's gonna be a crazy weekend, so I can't wait to see everyone and not not drink. I can promise more updates daily, along with pictures, so we need to spread the word that Kaip Suprast is back in business. With that said:

Donald Rumsfeld is giving the President his daily briefing. He concludes by saying: "Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldeirs were killed."

"OH NO!" the President exclaims. "That's terrible!"His staff sits stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as the President sits, head in hands.

Finally, the President looks up and asks, "How many is a brazillion?"


PS- Gint, Bleach is amazing, and I'm hooked on GITS :O